


Sadsturbate

by DangerSlut



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Blood, Catheters, Caught in the Act, M/M, Masturbation, Other, jacking off to inapporpriate thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-20
Updated: 2015-03-20
Packaged: 2018-03-18 18:43:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3579963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DangerSlut/pseuds/DangerSlut
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: imagine a thing: will in the hospital getting turned on by the memories of hannibal stabbing him. masturbating while hooked up to a heart monitor. getting caught by panicked nurses. :D ?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sadsturbate

**Author's Note:**

> Sadsturbate: Masturbation while in an intense period of remorse or sadness, lubrication naturally forming from tears raining down on one's frowny poundy.

He’s being touched. A hand on the back of his neck, breathe against his cheek… A chest pressed against his. Warm and strong and broad. Warmth spilling between him and his figment of desire. An ocean of red, lust, pouring out between them…

Drowning him.

Consuming him.

Will wakes with a gasps, sweating and shivering in his hospital bed. He’s had that dream before, many times before; he should be used to it by now. But when he’s drugged to the gills with morphine every day, it was harder to remember things. To tell the difference between reality and fantasy.

Sometime he wakes up and thinks Hannibal is in the room with him; sitting in the chair, at the foot of the bed, looming over him, but always smiling. Soft and gentle, like when Will had almost killed Clark Ingram. Proud.

The vision only lasts a moment, but it always leaves Will feeling empty and alone. God, he hadn’t wanted it to turn out like this.

There was no hallucination this time, but his dream had left him hot and uncomfortable, his cock hard and throbbing between his thighs even though it was stuffed full with a catheter. Shame and disgust build in him, hating himself for getting hard from dreaming about Hannibal disemboweling him in an attempt to kill him. For piercing and possessing him. Marking Will as his forever…

Biting his bottom lip in self-hatred, Will slides his hand under the covers and takes his cock in hand and squeezes it lightly. He hadn’t wanted things to end the way they did. He wanted to be with Hannibal so badly, if only…

Will brings his hand up to the wound on his belly and gently presses down, memories and memories of dreams swirling together as he thinks of that night. Of how handsome Hannibal looked disheveled and blood splattered. Of how his touch burned against Will’s skin and the pain of the knife…

Will winces as he tugs on his cock too roughly, getting over excited and forgetting about the catheter, causing a stab of pain deep within his abdomen. Even drugged as he was, he’s of right enough mind to focus on the head of his cock to avoid injuring himself. He massages the sensitive tip, biting the inside of his cheek to try and stifle his moans.

He thinks of the knife sinking into his belly. The initial resistance of his skin before the knife popped through and dove deep into his intestines. The rush of heat, their bodies pressed firmly together, Hannibal holding him. Confessing his love.

It the moment, it had been betrayal. But now, it was as close as Hannibal and he had ever gotten to sex. Real, truthful intimacy.

It’s pathetic that he’s using it to get off, but it was one of the few moments when there had been no lies or hidden motives between them. They had been stripped bare and left with nothing but honesty.

Will rather jack off to something real than some warped thing that he pointlessly hoped Hannibal could one day be.

Squeezing the head of his cock rhythmically, Will huffs and chews on his bottom lip, so close to cumming. He thinks of Hannibal pressed against him, Hannibal’s tears, the tremble of emotion in his voice as he said his goodbyes. All those real, honest moments.

“Mr. Graham!” calls a worried voice, the sound of hurried footsteps entering the room.

Will eyes snap open and he lets go of his cock the moment he hears the voices but it is too late. He cumming, and he whimpers, all his pleasure stolen by his horror at being caught. He becomes acutely aware of the desperate beeping of the heart monitor, blushing furiously and wishing he was more drugged than he currently was.

There was a titter of laughter, the nurses obviously understanding what he had been doing, but then someone hushes them and sends them on their way.

“I-I,” he stammers, pulling the blankets up to hide his face. “Sorry, I forgot about that. Sorry, I’m- Please… I-”

“Sssh, it’s alright dear. Completely natural,” says the nurse, her voice matronly and far to understanding. “But with your wounds as they are, and the catheter, it could be dangerous.”

“I forgot… The drugs…”

“It’s alright. Here, clean yourself off,” continues the nurse, placing a box of wet naps on the bed by his side. “I’ll get you a new gown and blankets for when you are done, and then we going to talk about how to do this safely and without setting off the alarms.”

Will moans in mortification, wishing Hannibal had killed him.


End file.
